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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27432559">Carry On (Only If You Can)</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/'>Anonymous</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Supernatural</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Aftermath, Angst, Character Death, Crying, Destiel - Freeform, Emotional Dean Winchester, Emotions, Episode: s15e18 Despair, Hurt, M/M, No Fluff, Sad</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-11-07</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-11-07</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-07 01:02:53</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>208</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27432559</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Dean Winchester sat down on the floor, tears flowing down his face.</p><p>His best friend was gone, and so was the love of his life.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Castiel/Dean Winchester</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>34</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Collections:</b></td><td>Anonymous</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Carry On (Only If You Can)</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <em>Cas is gone. Cas is gone. Cas is gone.</em>
</p><p>The sentence kept replaying in his mind, reminding him of how hopeless the entire situation was.</p><p>
  <em>Castiel is gone for good. He told you everything he felt, no matter how scary it was for him and you just stood there and did nothing. And you couldn't even do anything when he got absorbed by that damn thing.</em>
</p><p>There was absolutely nothing that could've prepared Dean for the feeling of loss he was experiencing at that precise moment. He had lost people before, lots of them, but losing Cas was an entirely different story. All the feelings hit Dean like a brick wall and all the memories that he was trying to push back were still there, making it impossible for him to concentrate or do literally anything else. All he could do was wait and hope that the feelings would somehow fade.</p><p>"I hate you," said Dean, surprising himself that he could say something during those moments of shock. "You left me right now, right now when I need you the most."</p><p>Those words couldn't help at all, but at least he said what he thought. Or at least part of it.</p><p>
  <em>Cas is gone. And I love him.</em>
</p>
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